Since my experience with taking Ballet Fit classes earlier this year, I've been asking myself what else is possible? If I could, in a relatively short period of time, reach a level of stretching I hadn't experienced in a long time, what other “muscles” or areas of my life do I wish to practice or develop? How often do I need to do it?
It is certain that only four months later, and not having exercised since, I no longer can stretch as I did the last class I attended. I figured that all spiritual practices, business activities, and behavioral patterns are the same way. At first they seem difficult, almost impossible, and as we commit to mastering them, we slowly see small changes, until it reaches a point that the results are truly noticeable. Then, in some cases, we stop practicing, and only get back to it when old patterns somehow bother us again.
As the new year begins, what areas of your life would you like to improve/change/learn?
In addition to my lack of exercise, here are some areas I've been working on and still could do better:
Meditation: Years ago, I started with simply focusing on inhaling and exhaling; later on I learned to count my breaths; I added filling my body with light; then I started following guided meditations; I gave myself permission to meditate for just a minute as needed, or to fall asleep while meditating; and today I follow my intuition. I have a daily morning practice of writing in my journal, and meditating. Although I rarely miss writing, I do skip meditation. If I keep skipping it for several days in a roll, I find it harder to go back to it, but I try to recommit as soon as I notice what's happening. I remember seeing a post with the recommendation: Meditate for 20 minutes a day, and if you are busy, meditate for one hour. It sounds accurate and a great advice.
Being mindful and in the moment: This one for me needs practice. I do sometimes as I walk, choose to focus on my steps and the environment for a block. At the end of the block, if I'm still present, I commit to walking another block in the moment. More often than not, I remember several blocks later (or the next day) that I've been thinking about all kinds of things, and forgot to be mindful. I find that I'm more present in certain situations than others, and I plan to work on it.
Being able to understand and shift emotions: I have attended courses, read many books, studied on my own, taught others, and applied the concepts learned on how to do so in my daily life. Still I go back to old habits, such as watching Netflix for hours to numb or avoid feelings, even though I'm fully aware that the feelings won't go away. This end of the year has put me on the edge in several occasions, and I've been practicing breathing, meditating, going deep within, naming the feelings, writing, walking, asking questions, and I'm noticing what I already knew, the tools do work. ; )
Drawing: A few years ago I found joy in taking pictures of flowers and drawing them. When I felt that I was doing better, I started to print the photos I took, draw them and give both the photo and drawing to friends, never redoing a drawing. I know for sure that I have a long way to go to be great. It is worth it, though, for how the drawing or painting practice makes me feel. I'm currently working on a new design, that may become a product some day, and I have surprised myself with the fact that I'm redrawing and redrawing my vision, until I'm able to create one worth sharing. Personally, this is another “muscle” worth investing in, for pure joy at first, which may someday become a source of inspiration for others.
Trusting self: I have shared the design I have in mind with a few people. Some were encouraging beyond my imagination, while others sort of discouraged me from pursuing it. My inner critic partnered with the latter. I keep reminding myself of my first book's title “Ask Others, Trust Yourself”. I'm choosing to trust myself, and I'm for now committing to the joy of creating it, no matter the outcome.
In all the examples aforementioned, I have found successes and failures. Even the skills/behaviors I could say I've mastered, I can think of several occasions that I ended up going back to old habits. The A-HA moment has been to realize that as in ballet and body muscles, all other muscles of emotions, talent, skills, if we lose awareness of them, we may go back to the old. Perhaps never completely, though, which is an encouragement.
What areas of your life would you like to work on? Which muscles do you need to start practicing, and which ones do you need to remind yourself of practicing?
I invite you to reflect on 2015, write down the “muscles” you worked on, and the ones you would like to develop. Then, recommit to them all, and create a way to remind yourself to do so in the new year:
- Mark your calendar;
- Set up reminders on your smart phone;
- Do it every day (or a few times a week) at the same time;
- Commit to allocating enough time to practice them;
- Be aware of your progress;
- Let go of guilt if/when you start slacking for a while – guilt tends to lead to stuckness, not to movement;
- Recommit as needed;
- Acknowledge and celebrate your practice;
- Keep renewing your commitment.
In one of my meditations, I received an intuitive message that I'd like to leave you with:
“There is no need to be perfect, there is more perfection in the imperfections than any where else.” How about declaring that 2016 will be a year not to try to be perfect, or to be perceived as perfect, and letting go of any attachment that life must look or be a certain way to be “good”?
I wish you a 2016 filled with all the love and emotions you would like to experience.
Namaste,
Elisa Balabram
PS. 2016 has 366 days, what would you do with the extra day? How much self-love will you practice with it? What will you create with the extra 24 hours? Have fun with it!
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